On Gay Marriage

Today I've been a little reflective on the issue of same-gender marriage. Tired of being tagged as discriminatory, I find myself wanting to avoid the issue altogether. But avoidance won't allow me to confront the issue.

I do not second-guess whether gay marriage should be allowed or not. It's clear to me that marriage is a sacred institution that is designed to head up a family. The masculine and feminine qualities brought by man and wife are divinely designed to bring a mix of discipline, nurturing, love, and example necessary to raise a well-balanced child. I've said before that it is my belief that marriage isn't so much about two people loving each other (though that's necessary for a healthy marriage) as it is about raising a solid upcoming generation..

I feel badly for those who are gay, empathize with their frustration, and I believe in many cases they have not made a conscious choice to be attracted to those of the same gender. I have no doubt that their lives are often difficult and complicated because of their sexual orientation. Without compromising the tenets of my faith, I try to understand their struggle and truly hope for the best for them.

A friend told me this morning, angry at the passage of Proposition 8, that it disgusts her that we can elect a black President, but won't give gays equal rights. I can see why she would see it that way, but I often wonder if there's any effort made by gay marriage proponents to understand where the opposition to them comes from. Typically our efforts to be understood are met with cynical eye-rolling followed by an angry comment about discrimination. We are divided, and there seems to be no good effort to close the division.

To me the issue comes down to a basic question over if we are led by God or not. We can choose to redefine marriage, allowing any number of consenting adults to enter into any sort of relationship they want. We can then say that that's "marriage". We can make all the choices and semantic changes we want in society.

But we cannot choose the consequences of those choices.

It is indisputable that children who grow up in a home with a mom and dad who love them are happier, healthier, more productive. Marriage provides children with a whole host of tools that will aid them throughout their life. Traditional marriage is an ancient, time-tested, mechanism of success for creating happy lives.

I plead with those who are angry over Prop 8's passage to understand that we believe strongly in this institution and are unwilling to tinker with it in the midst of a politically-correct frenzy, simply for the sake of "inclusion". It isn't about you. It never was about you. It's about the future generations.